The world wide web is abuzz this week with all things Mother's Day. From flash sales to parenting articles to fashion Q&A's, it seems May 13th is on everyone's mind. I don't remember Mother's & Father's Day being such a big deal before having a babe of our own, but I feel like it's all I hear about in May and June and well, seeing as it's a holiday to honor yours truly, I'm happy to oblige in the festivities.
I just finished reading an article on Refinery 29 about cute-mom style. What interested me more than the style was the set of questions they asked each of the moms. So in honor of Mother's Day coming up this weekend, I thought this would be a good forum for me to answer the same set of questions to give you a little insight as to how I'm feeling 14.5 months into this new adventure. So here goes:
What's the most surprising thing you've discovered about yourself since becoming a mother?:
There's a couple things...
1 - I never knew it was possible to feel so much love for another human being. It's a different kind of love, completely unconditional, completely overwhelming and a little scary at times.
2 - I don't think I really comprehended before having Hayes how unselfish motherhood makes you. You don't have a choice - his needs come first. Period. End of story.
3 - Your body can take a whole lot. Pregnancy, childbirth, lack of sleep, little exercise (again, that whole unselfish thing!). You can take a whole lotta pain, you can and will bounce back and once you have a few nights of no sleep, 3 hours feels like a full night and you realize as nice as it is to have a full 8 hours, it also isn't completely necessary.
How has your style changed since you've had kids?:
It hasn't really. I've always had a no-frills, comfortable sense of style. Maybe I wear shirts that are a bit more flowy now, but I think that's more of a current trend thing vs. mom-style. I do accept that when I wear bracelets or chunky necklaces now, I have to share them with Hayes - kid loves him some accessories!
What's the best advice you've ever gotten from your mother?:
"This too shall pass..." I remember when Hayes was 4 days old and my parents were still at the house helping out. Hayes was fussy, I was incredibly sleep deprived and my new-mom baby blues were in full effect. As I sat there in the chair in Hayes' room, nursing him for the zillionth time, crying my eyes out about how much harder this whole motherhood thing was than I thought it would be, my mom sat at my feet and let me vent. She reminded me that this was a phase, that we would get through it and told me we were doing the best job we could. I think of her advice when we're going through a rough patch and although it's hard to accept in the moment, looking back, the rough patch always passes and you're a stronger parent as a result.
What's the one piece of advice you WISH you had gotten before becoming a mom?:
Be spontaneous, because once you have a baby, you can't do things on a whim anymore.
And if you feel like wasting a day sleeping on the couch, don't feel guilty about it - be selfish and do it, goddammit!
If you could give yourself a mother's day present, what would it be?:
I don't need anything materialistic. I'd like a day with my boys, a nice brunch, time to relax and some appreciation for this huge hat I wear. I don't want to have to think about when to put Hayes down for a nap, or what to feed him for dinner. I just want to enjoy being a mom, without all of the daily necessary chores that come along with it. Although I wouldn't turn down a massage or mani/pedi... ;-)
What are your favorite things to do together?:
Snuggle on the couch or in bed when Hayes has his am and pm milk. Go to the park together. Do things as a family so I can spend time with my two favorite people. Hear the little guy's infectious laugh and capture it on camera so I can hold onto that moment forever ;-)