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Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Tomorrow, I'll do better...

To say Greyson has been a challenge lately would be an understatement. 
Our little Grey Grey, who stubbornly came into this world a week late on his own terms, has always been opinionated and determined and destined to go far in life because he won't be putting up with the shit people will try and throw his way.

Mix that with a heavy dose of the 'terrible twos' and you've got yourself quite the combination. Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING is a struggle with that one. He says no just to not say yes. He wants whatever he can't have. Even after given choices about everything, he freaks out and wants the opposite of what he's chosen. It's a constant battle, constant negotiation, constant fight and sometimes I end my days just feeling so down about the relationship I feel like I have with him lately.

I don't want to be that parent who's constantly yelling, constantly saying no, constantly fighting with my kids. I don't want to feel as though I frequently need my own time out in order to stop myself from physically hurting him, grabbing him a bit too hard (to which he usually laughs, making it all the more infuriating!). It's tough and it sucks and I can't wait for this trying phase to be over with (and am praying it's not a personality trait that'll stick around forever!).

Lately it's been hard. I have to remind myself to take a deep breath and to visit the well of patience that's constantly running dry. 

Some days are better than others. When he's on his own without Hayes, for instance, it's like being with a different kid. Hayes somehow brings out the worst in him - well they really bring out the worst in each other, constantly fighting and clawing at each others throats these days. 
And on the flip side, he is the most hilarious two year old I've ever met with a personality that literally explodes out of his body, which is awesome to be around. High highs and low lows with that one.

Anyways, I came across this article a few weeks ago on the interwebs and loved it. It's a good read that reminds parents that tomorrow is a new day, full of possibility. I needed to read it and I can't tell you how much I relate to the author in this current moment.

Tomorrow I will try to do better. 
Tomorrow I will continue to remind myself that he's two. Tomorrow I will try and keep my cool, relax a little and indulge in some messy toddler time. Tomorrow I will remember that one day, I'll miss his insistence on having us change him into three different pairs of pajamas before he goes down for his nap and let him painstakingly go through every single sippy cup before choosing the first option I gave him. 
And tonight, I'll pour myself a large glass of wine and have comfort in knowing that there's someone else out there going through the same infuriating phase I am! 

Two year olds... ay yai yai.

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